I have a question, then.
Being up late and bored, I decided to watch a little Art Attack on Youtube and indulge my inner eight-year-old, who by the way is still throwing a tantrum over its cancellation. So I search "Art Attack" and it gives me some videos and some alternative searches: art atack, art attak, the usual misspelled goodness. However the first one is "mensaje subliminal". Why? Is this a new conspiracy theory? Was Neil Buchanan actually an evil genius putting subliminal messages into his programmes? In Spanish? I suppose it would explain my continued love of the man. He's my favourite shit celebrity ever, just ahead of Roy Walker and Maurice Flynn of BBC Points West. He's only third because of the time I actually met him, which provided me with endless amusement. We were at the Balloon Fiesta, collecting free stuff, and when we discovered that we could get Maurice Flynn's autograph, our Shit Celebrity radars went off. Brilliant! We'd never even heard of him! A nice man informs Maurice Flynn that we want his autograph.
"What?" says Maurice, looking genuinely petrified, "No they don't!"
We assure him that yes, we do, and he signs the photos whilst looking at us partly as though we're insane, but mostly as though we're going to eat him. He then turns bright red and vanishes. I do occasionally wonder if we scarred him for life that day. Poor bloke.
I do want to point out the difference between a Shit Celebrity and a Celebrity Who Is Shit. A Shit Celebrity is barely remembered, but fondly remembered. A Celebrity Who Is Shit is well known but everyone hates them. This particular blog is a Shit Celebrity supporter, and will try not to mention Celebrities Who Are Shit unless they're actually relevant to the national news somehow. I do enjoy collecting Shit Celebrities and might turn them into another regular feature. Yay!
ETA: Oh My God. This is the best thing I've ever seen. Oh, Neil. You do make it so easy for me to love you.